Our Flag Means Death is a wild ride. It tells true tale of Stede Bonnet, a rich guy who ditched his fancy life for piracy. With a crew that’s more clueless than skilled, Bonnet chases treasure and excitement on high seas. Famous pirates pop up along his journey. Expect lots of laughs and quirky moments. It’s a fresh spin on pirate stories, packed with humor and fun. Don’t miss out!

Meet the characters from Our Flag Means Death

Stede Bonnet

Oh my god Stede is just — the dapper disaster you didn’t know you needed; he’s a gentleman-turned-pirate who brings etiquette manuals to sword fights and honestly I love that chaotic energy. He’s awkward and sincere and tries to do things the “right” way even when everyone else is like “we’re stabbing people, Stede.” He’ll absolutely offer you tea mid-mutiny and then forget where he put his sword (seriously I think it’s in a bonnet once? maybe not). There’s a real soft, confused bravery to him — part coward, part hero, mostly trying to be useful and failing beautifully and then succeeding.

Blackbeard

Blackbeard is theatrical, enormous, terrifying and also oddly introspective, like he reads poetry between terrifying people and setting things on fire. He’s the kind of villain who smokes in slow motion and philosophizes about mortality while styling his beard, and yes he might have a flair for the dramatic that borders on performance art. He’s terrifying in the way that makes you wonder what he’s actually afraid of (spoiler: probably feelings and/or losing control). He’s both ruthless and weirdly tender sometimes, which ruins you because you can’t decide whether to be terrified or fall in love with his gloom.

Wee John Feeney

Wee John is a giant teddy bear in a pirate’s body — huge, loud, quick to a brawl and quicker to a hug, like if a boulder could comfort you. He’ll smash your skull and then offer you a biscuit, which is a very specific vibe but also true. He sings these ridiculous lullabies that are somehow soothing, and also might secretly collect spoons? I can’t be sure about the spoon thing but I love picturing him with a tarnished spoon trophy.

Oluwande

Oluwande is stoic and steady, the kind of calm person who looks like they’ve seen everything and therefore can handle your chaos with a single eyebrow raise. He’s quiet but deep, like he’s holding novels behind his eyes and occasionally tosses out a line that makes everyone reconsider their life choices. There’s honor and patience there, and also an oddly specific penchant for keeping small, perfectly arranged piles of things (coins, maybe shells — I don’t know, I’m imagining shells). He’s the heart that keeps the ship from truly falling apart, even if he’ll never loudly claim the credit.

Black Pete

Black Pete is gruff, blunt, and secretly very old-soul-sad, like he’s been through a thousand mornings at sea and the worst joke still makes him snort. He’s loyal to a fault and will side-eye anyone who breathes wrong near his captain, and yet he has these weird soft spots (a cat? a tragic story about a sandwich?) that make him unexpectedly lovable. He curses a lot, which is both funny and somehow poetic, and he looks like he’s made of rope and rain. He’s the kind of man who will throw you off the ship and then rescue you because, rules.

Roach

Roach is small, deadpan, and quietly ferocious, like a pocket-sized hurricane who won’t explain herself and that makes it infinitely more mysterious. She’s practical to a fault — does the job, fixes the problem, stabs the problem if necessary — and also has these odd gentle habits, like maybe collecting buttons or sleeping with a book she never reads? Sometimes she’s mute and sometimes she’ll drop a single line that destroys you emotionally, so never underestimate her. She’s both terrifying and mundane simultaneously, and that contrast is exactly the vibe.

Lucius

Lucius is theatrical, fashionable, and absolutely the person who will narrate a betrayal like it’s a season finale of his own show. He’s dramatic in the best way — loves a good entrance, loves gossip, probably has an emergency wardrobe change hidden in his coat. He’s more cunning than he first appears, though he’ll distract you with eyeliner and a scandalous anecdote while he subtly rearranges the power balance. He’s also inexplicably fond of pastries, which is either a metaphor or very literal; I choose literal.

Buttons

Buttons is anxious in the most endearing way — kind of a worrywart but fiercely loyal, the one who will apologize for the weather and then die for his friends. He’s devoted, polite, and makes a point of remembering birthdays even if he forgets his own name sometimes (no, I’m kidding… maybe). He can be comic relief but also heart-stopping when things go sideways, which is a weird combo that works beautifully. He keeps tiny trifles in his pockets, like receipts from feelings.

Frenchie

Frenchie is flamboyant, dramatic, and impossibly charming — equal parts baker, swordsman, and someone who absolutely narrates every mood with a flourish. He loves a good story, a good dress, and will give you the most sincere compliment ever before plunging a dagger into a villain’s heart (with style). He’s tender and chaotic, melodramatic and practical — like, he’ll make you a crêpe while plotting navigation routes. Also, ridiculously emotional about small animals? Probably.